One Human's Odor is Another Dog's Cologne

Tonight was bath night. Yuck! My lady human said I stink. I think that's another way of saying I smell too good for the rest of them.

My male human never said anything, but he accepts me as I am, Eau de Backyard and all.

Anyway, my lady human has to resort to underhanded tricks to get me into the tub. She use treats to lure me and distracts me with the wonderful aroma of those little beagle bites. Then, when she has me in the room where the tub is, she closes the door. No escape! At least she lets me have the treats.

What is really devious about all of this is that she lures me into that room at other times and doesn't give me a bath. Then, after I've let my guard down, splish, splash, I am taking a bath.

I hate baths. They mess up my perfectly coiffed fur and take away the smells that make me the Beagle I am. Once I get out of the tub, I could be any dog, even a Poodle or a Pekingese *shudder*. Talk about useless. But that's a topic for another day.

I got my revenge, though. Once I escaped from the tub, I rolled on the carpet everywhere I could and left behind nice wet spots up and down the hallway. When they step in them, it's almost like stepping in you know what. It's almost as much fun as the time I used their bed as a toilet. Now that's my kind of fun!

Bark. Bark. Growl.

Updates and Observations

I haven't had much to say lately. My humans haven't done a lot lately (they're kind of boring sometimes, to tell the truth), so there hasn't been a whole lot to blog about.

My humans recently got me a new doghouse on wheels. It's newer and nicer than the last one, and it has nice big windows I can look out of all day. When I'm not sleeping that is. So far, we've only gone out of town with it once, but that was a lot of fun.

As I get older, I become more aware of just how easily humans are amused. For instance, my lady human is all excited because she "taught" me to shake and lay down. Heck, I lay down all day anyway, and if I can get a treat for doing what comes naturally just because she says "lay down" I am all over that.

I'll admit that learning to shake was a little more challenging. Being right-pawed, I only shake with that paw. If I were ambipawterous, or if there was the potential for increasing the treat intake, I might try harder to learn to shake left-pawed, but she seems happy, and I get treats for little work, so it seems like a win-win situation.

Hopefully my humans will get off their tails and start doing more stuff with me so I have more to write about. It's hard to type with these paws (try it sometime), so I want it to be worthwhile. Regardless, I'll certainly be back next month (if not sooner). It's my birthday, and I'm hoping for lots of treats and other goodies (hint, hint). I also know we have a birthday trip planned (they're calling it Labor Day, whatever that is, but I know better), so I hope to have something to report from that.

Hey! You know why cats have nine lives? Because the first eight are so boring, they keep coming back trying to get it right.

Bark. Bark. Growl.