Ollie's Big Adventure

This week, I got a taste of some real freedom. Thanks to the fact that the fence around my humans' house is almost falling down in spots (no one seems to know who the fence belongs to, which is great for me), I found a spot to squeeze through, and I was gone.

Ah, the new sights and new scents! So much to see; so much to smell. Unfortunately for me, when I escaped our yard and got through a neighbor's yard, I turned the wrong way and ended up at the end of a dead-end street. So I couldn't make a complete getaway.

When my female human discovered I'd broken out, I guess she was worried because she came running. She was so cute; she seemed so worried when she spotted me. Not that I was. I was having too much fun.

However, I was at the end of a road, and I didn't feel like trying to crawl through plant life and who knows what to get somewhere else. So when my female human called for me, I swallowed my pride and my desire for freedom and adventure and came running. If I'd known how much she was going to carry on afterward about the fact that I came back, I probably would have thought twice about doing so.

I probably would have still come back, though, at least this time. My male human takes pretty good care of me; he feeds me and gives me water. Plus, he would probably miss not being able to pet me or have me sleep in his lap. And it's not like I can get room service just anywhere.

But now that I've had a small taste of freedom, the attraction is strong. One day, not even the promise of a treat may be enough to bring me back. So they might want to think about fixing the fence, regardless of whose it is.

Bark. Bark. Growl.

One Human's Odor is Another Dog's Cologne

Tonight was bath night. Yuck! My lady human said I stink. I think that's another way of saying I smell too good for the rest of them.

My male human never said anything, but he accepts me as I am, Eau de Backyard and all.

Anyway, my lady human has to resort to underhanded tricks to get me into the tub. She use treats to lure me and distracts me with the wonderful aroma of those little beagle bites. Then, when she has me in the room where the tub is, she closes the door. No escape! At least she lets me have the treats.

What is really devious about all of this is that she lures me into that room at other times and doesn't give me a bath. Then, after I've let my guard down, splish, splash, I am taking a bath.

I hate baths. They mess up my perfectly coiffed fur and take away the smells that make me the Beagle I am. Once I get out of the tub, I could be any dog, even a Poodle or a Pekingese *shudder*. Talk about useless. But that's a topic for another day.

I got my revenge, though. Once I escaped from the tub, I rolled on the carpet everywhere I could and left behind nice wet spots up and down the hallway. When they step in them, it's almost like stepping in you know what. It's almost as much fun as the time I used their bed as a toilet. Now that's my kind of fun!

Bark. Bark. Growl.

Updates and Observations

I haven't had much to say lately. My humans haven't done a lot lately (they're kind of boring sometimes, to tell the truth), so there hasn't been a whole lot to blog about.

My humans recently got me a new doghouse on wheels. It's newer and nicer than the last one, and it has nice big windows I can look out of all day. When I'm not sleeping that is. So far, we've only gone out of town with it once, but that was a lot of fun.

As I get older, I become more aware of just how easily humans are amused. For instance, my lady human is all excited because she "taught" me to shake and lay down. Heck, I lay down all day anyway, and if I can get a treat for doing what comes naturally just because she says "lay down" I am all over that.

I'll admit that learning to shake was a little more challenging. Being right-pawed, I only shake with that paw. If I were ambipawterous, or if there was the potential for increasing the treat intake, I might try harder to learn to shake left-pawed, but she seems happy, and I get treats for little work, so it seems like a win-win situation.

Hopefully my humans will get off their tails and start doing more stuff with me so I have more to write about. It's hard to type with these paws (try it sometime), so I want it to be worthwhile. Regardless, I'll certainly be back next month (if not sooner). It's my birthday, and I'm hoping for lots of treats and other goodies (hint, hint). I also know we have a birthday trip planned (they're calling it Labor Day, whatever that is, but I know better), so I hope to have something to report from that.

Hey! You know why cats have nine lives? Because the first eight are so boring, they keep coming back trying to get it right.

Bark. Bark. Growl.

What a Dog's Gotta Do

Sometimes, a dog's just gotta show their humans what's really important. That is to say, show the humans just who's boss.

Yesterday, my human was sort of running on this big round black thing, but he wasn't going anywhere. And he certainly wasn't giving me the attention due me as a regal member of the canine community.

Since he wasn't going anywhere, I figured he might as well spend some of that energy lavishing attention on me. But, humans being humans, he needed a little nudge, a not-so-subtle hint that his energies would be better spent elsewhere. That is to say on me.

Here I am. Of course, it doesn't
pay to look too interested.

So I took the plunge. Needless to say, I was a bit nervous about getting up on the round black thing. But, as they say, nothing ventured, nothing gained. So up I went.

Of course, once I was up on the round black thing, my human had to get off since he couldn't run while I was there. And that was the whole point.

Luckily, my human is pretty smart, at least as humans go. He got the hint, sat down on the floor, and began ministering to me. I rewarded him by allowing him to pet me and then, to show my appreciation of his efforts, by licking his hand.

Some might think I was being a bit shameless by being so blatant in my approach. But you know what they say. Sometimes a dog's gotta do what a dog's gotta do.

Bark. Bark. Howl.

My Kind of Fun

Ah, the weekend! Nothing like a little time in the sun, a little food, and a little game of keep-away from my human. You can take a look here: 
Of course, I have to let my humans have the ball once in a while, or they lose interest. So, I let them think they're taking the ball away from me. Then I howl so they'll know to give it back, and we start all over again.

Playing keep-away with my humans is fun - for a little while. Eventually, though, I get tired of the game. Then it's time for a little snooze, unless of course there is food to be had. Nothing perks me up like a little snack. Maybe I can get them to serve me on the veranda, whatever that is.

Bark. Bark. Howl.

The Other Dog

Lately, my human hasn't been home as much as he used to be, and I'm getting a little suspicious. I can't prove anything, but I suspect he's got another dog on the side.

It's late when he gets home, and he's usually too tired to do anything except rub my belly a little and maybe throw the ball once or twice. He doesn't seem to have the energy to chase me when I'm keeping the ball away from him (my favorite game).

I hear the other humans talk about him working so much, but I think he's been cheating on me. After all, I don't see any new treats or toys for me. If he's working extra, where the proof?

So far, I can't prove anything. I sniff every night when he gets home, trying to catch a scent of "the other dog," but so far, nothing. But I know it's out there somewhere.

Regardless of whether it's another beagle, a collie, or, Dog forbid, a poodle, I can wait. Sooner or later, he'll come to his senses and remember whose human he is. When that time comes, I'll be waiting to play keep away or maybe just to lay in his lap. He seems to like that.

Freedom!

I got to ride in the big truck the other day, and we had the big white house on wheels behind us. That meant we were going somewhere. Yippee!

I didn't know where we were going, but I didn't care. I just knew there would be new things to sniff, new things to see, new territories to mark.

My human nearly got us in an accident when he almost hit some other human stopped in the middle of the road. If I could have gotten out, I'd have gone and given him a piece of my mind. And, before you ask, yes beagles have minds. We just don't mind all the time. That's a little beagle pun, by the way.

My stay here so far has not been as much fun as I'd hoped it would be. We've spent most of our time inside, but I can't blame my human too much. It has been windy and wet, and I don't care much for water except to drink it once in a while.

Still, I did get to go out and about a few times so i could say hello to the neighbors. Most of them aren't of the same social class, but one must be polite. Even a mutt has feelings, I guess.

My human has promised if the weather gets better he'll take me for a nice long walk. That would be divine. There'd be plenty to see and sniff, and afterward, I could take a nice long nap. A beagle's life can be pretty good sometimes.

Bark. Bark. Howl.